The news that the average woman changes her clothes four times a day on holiday (as reported by various newspapers this week) couldn’t be more at odds with my own travel habits. For me, hitting the road is the perfect excuse for being as slovenly as public decency permits. Make-up melts in the heat; Balenciagas don’t mix with the beach. I could – nay, will – argue that knackered flip-flops and bed-hair are essential facets of backpacker cool.
Still, there are limits to my ‘just look like shit’ theory. Alternating a few tank tops and never so much as hovering a comb over your hair is one thing; men wearing harem pants is another. It never ceases to amaze me how many perfectly normal chaps go world wandering and resultantly think it acceptable to dress like Aladdin. No doubt they feel this fashion choice shows they are free from the shackles of the first world. Really, they might as well don a sandwich board that reads ‘berk’.
But it’s not just the boys who are guilty of misjudged globe-trotter ‘chic’. Think Monica getting her hair braided in Friends. I had a mate who indulged in similar folly; she came home resembling a sea urchin. Further signs of ‘got carried away on holiday’ include anyone who starts sporting a conical hat or tie-dye trousers. People who own ‘same same but different’ T-shirts: go stand in the corner and think about what you have done.
It’s great to get away and indulge in being liberated from your everyday self, but be sure to remember some simple rules.
No make-up or hair products = longer lie-ins and lighter bags. But harem pants = tool.
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In the tropics you would have to constantly get changed to go snorkeling... otherwise your magic pants would end up drowning you which is quite the inconvenience ... more